Today is three weeks since he left. Do I feel any different ? No not really. I guess I can talk about it now without completely falling to pieces, but I still cry. It hurts so much when people don't know and they talk to me about him. For instance when I was leaving the school today (after doing some governors duties) the reception staff mentioned they had seen him on 'The Weakest Link'. I still love him so much and have hope in my heart that he may return. I keep going really for the sake of the girls. If it were just me....... well I don't know how far I would go.
I've been reflecting again on what the future looks like if he doesn't come back and I really don't like it. Our plans for retirement, relaxation and travel have really gone through the window. So not only has the manipulating ***** ruined my life now, she has for our/my future too. That makes me feel like its not worth living for the future any more - so sad :-(
I guess I am having a down day again today. Not many up days yet...... True that the house is cleaner, there is less washing, ironing, rubbish, spending etc etc. but all of it has no purpose when you have no one to share it with, especially the one you really love. I still feel empty.
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