Everything I see or hear at the moment seems to hurt me. Lyrics to songs relating to love or break ups, the book I am reading has a marriage break up in it (and its a murder/mystery....). Its really hard at the moment because no everyone who needs to know, knows yet, so I'm having to hold it together as much as possible.
I have some really really great friends - I had never expected them to rally around me like this - you know who you are - thank you :-)
I put the Christmas tree and decorations up today with one of my wonderful daughters. It's hard to be jolly - its difficult as you feel crap but also don't want allow it to all consume you. If you smile and laugh will people think you are over it already ? What one sees on the outside is not what the inside feels like. Our great british reserve makes us like this doesn't it ?
Rightly or wrongly I had a rant at my husband yesterday telling him what a manipulative ***** 'the other woman' is and how she targeted him, I don't think he really listened but it helped me to have my say. Am I going through the anger phase yet ? Maybe its starting. I am a christian and pray that God opens his eyes to what a mistake he is making. Of course I may feel different in a few months time, but at the moment I would have him back in a flash. Is that wrong ?
Click here >> Sob.....
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