After lots of thought and discussion with myself mostly I decided to step down as the chair of governors for the school I was at. I didn't feel I was doing a good job - at least not how I consider I should be doing it. I told the head on Friday and he was very understanding and even gave me a hug. When I left the school I sat in the car and cried. Another sense of loss for me - I have been a school governor for 15 years. I really didn't want to give up but something had to go. I didn't want to give up the theatre group as I have many friends there and that has kept me going over the last months. Without that I would be sat at home on my own almost every night. And I didn't want to give up the studying as I am so close to finishing (another year, maybe two - but that's it). So the only thing left was the school governor :-(
Yesterday on a whim I decided to have a pedicure and my toes nails painted. It does make me feel good when my toes look nice :-)
I'm still finding myself very emotional at times and will start to cry at the drop of a hat. A good friend came around for a chat on Thursday and I found myself in tears again - it all still hurts......
In some ways I am ready to move on and in others I am not. Small steps forwards I guess.
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