In the beginning

On Monday 6th December my husband of over 28 years declared that he is leaving me for another woman. Apparently I have done nothing wrong and he still loves me but is not 'in love' with me.

His affair started around 18 months ago by 'the other woman' contacting and propositioning him on facebook. Now he is no angel as he should have said no - but why would a woman deliberately set out to break up a marriage that was not in trouble just because hers was on the rocks ? To be fair to my husband he told me after I noted that he seemed to be distant - at least I didn't find out via some other route !

We tried twice to make a go of it but both times she managed to come back into his life again opening up wounds and making him think again of her never really giving us a chance. She claims she is 'thick' but I think she targeted him as she could see what a wonderful man is he and wanted him to replace her broken marriage (by her I hasten to add). I also think she is a manipulating *****.

I still love my husband as he is my soulmate and always has been and also was my best friend. So not only has she stolen my husband, she has stolen my soulmate and my best friend.

This blog will hopefully be therapeutic for me and maybe help others who find themselves in a similar situation xx





Wednesday, 10 August 2011

It has been a while

A couple of my friends mentioned to me that I hadn't posted anything for a while so I thought I would tonight. I have been so busy at work, with studying and so on I have had late nights and so haven't got around to writing my blog.

My friends continue to be lovely and caring - I don't know if they realise how much they have helped me over the months. I don't think I could have done it without their kindness and support. I just hope I can be there for them in the future.

How do I feel now seven months since he left ? Still very sad. Still hate the manipulating *****. Have I moved on yet ? In some small way yes but I have a long way to go yet. I just about feel like my head has come out from some awful fog and I can think a bit straighter - well at work anyhow. But as another friend says I still over think things. Much has changed in my life and around me with my friends. Coping with so much change at once is really hard.

I'm getting used to being on my own and cry less. My husband still keeps in touch by text. He stopped for a few days after our wedding anniversary but he has started to text more often again. I don't know how I feel about that. I certainly find it easier when he doesn't text or contact me. Still dreading the first time I see them together.

Out of interest I had a look at how many local men were on match.com. A very narrow search brought up pages of them. I couldn't just contact one out of the blue, its just not me.  Would I want a relationship again - I don't really know. But I know if I do it would have to be with someone I know as a friend first. So I don't think it is going to happen anyhow as I can't see anyone wanting me. I don't think I need a man but I am a bit scared of being alone as I get older :-( but then again I come from good strong European stock with parents who survived tough times during the war.

My nails and skin went through another bad patch but seem to be on the mend again. It must be stress related.

I go on holiday for a week in a few days with a girlfriend. I really need the break.
Posted by at

No comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)