In the beginning

On Monday 6th December my husband of over 28 years declared that he is leaving me for another woman. Apparently I have done nothing wrong and he still loves me but is not 'in love' with me.

His affair started around 18 months ago by 'the other woman' contacting and propositioning him on facebook. Now he is no angel as he should have said no - but why would a woman deliberately set out to break up a marriage that was not in trouble just because hers was on the rocks ? To be fair to my husband he told me after I noted that he seemed to be distant - at least I didn't find out via some other route !

We tried twice to make a go of it but both times she managed to come back into his life again opening up wounds and making him think again of her never really giving us a chance. She claims she is 'thick' but I think she targeted him as she could see what a wonderful man is he and wanted him to replace her broken marriage (by her I hasten to add). I also think she is a manipulating *****.

I still love my husband as he is my soulmate and always has been and also was my best friend. So not only has she stolen my husband, she has stolen my soulmate and my best friend.

This blog will hopefully be therapeutic for me and maybe help others who find themselves in a similar situation xx





Saturday, 3 November 2012

Should I divorce ?

I always swore at the beginning of this change in my life that I would not be the one to divorce my husband. But having visited the solicitor again this week t seems that the best way to protect my interests and ensure that there is an inheritance for the girls I should perhaps start divorce proceedings. Speaking with a variety of friends they agree. Maybe it would help me move on but something is stopping me. In my heart  still have hope that he will return and I would still have him back - is that stupid ?

I have now managed to lose 2.5 stone in weight and folk are starting to notice :-) That makes me feel so good! Last night a chap in the pub asked me who my partner was and when I said I didn't have one he asked me how that could be possible !

I still flip flop between feeling confident and wanting to go and do things and apathy just wanting to stay at home. I'm wondering if I need to go and get some counselling to help me move on ? I have a course coming up at work that will be looking at health, and physical and emotional fitness. I'm a little scared about doing it as I'm hoping that I wont end up crying as it would be so embarrassing  On the other hand I was hoping it may help me plan some goals and move on.

I have booked a flight to go and visit my friends in Spain again and am trying to see if I can get out to Germany to see my cousins before Christmas.  also went ahead and booked myself on a weekend photography course in March next year. I'm really looking forward to that.

I had my exam for my last mandatory OU module and am now waiting for the results which I should get just before Christmas  And I had great fun performing n Pirates of Penzance. Its the first show since he left that I really enjoyed.

Anyhow must go and get ready as I am off to a friends 30th birthday fancy dress party. I'm going as Robin Hood however the costume is rather short - hope it will be OK !!!


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