Its been a month since I last posted. It's been a month of mixed emotions.
I went to the Edinburgh fringe for a week. Stays in uni accommodation arranged by a friend and went up on the train in first class. On the trip up a gentleman aside me asked if I could help him get the live cricket on his phone, which I did. He was delighted especially as England won the Ashes :-) we all got chatting afterwards and he mentioned that he was a song writer going to Edinburgh to hear one of his new songs being played at the tattoo. He mentioned that he wrote the song Love Grows when I mentioned that I presented a radio show. He was charmimg and gave me his email address. He was Barry Madon who has written songs sung by many famous people such as Elvis, Tom Jones etc. I have since sent him a best wishes email but not had a response.
I saw some great shows at the fringe and managed to walk up Arthurs Seat ( took about two hours round trip). For some of the shows I was with one of the group I travelled up and shared accommodation with, but quite a lots of the time I was alone. Whilst I prefer to be in the company of others I'm finding that I am starting to adapt to being alone and am a little concerned that I will end up preferring it.
The Sunday after I came back was the day that my ex had arranged a family BBQ and had asked the girls to go to meet the manipulating ***** . They went for a short while but unfortunately I was on my own leaving me with my own thoughts and I got rather upset again. My youngest daughter and her boyfriend kindly came back after to spend some time with me as they knew I would probably be upset. They told me that the BBQ wasn't that good - I wonder if they said that to make me feel better?
Work is still slow but I have now decided to just let it run down over the forthcoming months and not worry about it. I am both looking forward to leaving but also scared about what it will bring. I so need to have a conversation with an outplacement coach to get my head straight. Do I retire or do I have to continue some work ? I have so many ideas and potential threads in my head at the moment.
I manage to have a frank chat with one of my friends whom I felt let me down very badly and upset me. He apologised and said it was 'his bad'. Not a lot you can do about it - but it still hurts......
I've had a terrific weekend the best for a long while. After going with my eldest daughter to see what kind of mortgage she could get and then signing her up to some letting agencies as she is unlikely to be able to afford anything yet, both my daughters and I went for tea in a posh hotel near (ish) us. It was lovely spending time chatting with the girls. I love doing things together. I wish it were more often. Following that I came home and changed into my galactic explorer costume and then picked up a friend to go to Secret Cinema - the empire strikes back 😆 oh it was so much fun being immersed in the environment. It made me realise that I should most definetly give TV and film extra work a shot once redundant. I hope some agencies will accept me when i sign up.
Today I went to a 9am yoga class. This was my third which is held in a lavender field. It was a beautiful warm morning and heavenly. My first week it was so lovely too I found myself crying ( with wonder and joy) whilst we were relaxing. The icing on the cake this week was my dance teacher form my favourite contemporary classes from a while ago was there so we caught up and chatted in old times. She doesn't teach anymore but loads of the people I used to dance with are still going to a class that she now also attends. I've so got to go along and catch up with them all. We used to have a lovely fun time together.
For lunch I met up with an ex work colleague and his wife. We had a lovely chat 😃 and then in the evening my daughter and her boyfriend sat in the living room with me . A lovely mixed weekend but with a enough spare time to catch up on housey things.
