It's now over two and a half years since he left and I still have not to over it..... How long will it take ?
I'm seeing my husband quite a bit at the moment because of my mother in law who is now in a nursing home. Every time I see him my heart hurts :-( I decided this week that I still love and care for him and the least I can do is be his friend. I still and never will want anything to do with the manipulating *****. I still wish the worst things for her.....uncharacteristic of me and the only person in my whole life that I have felt that way about.
So how is life for me two and a half years later ?
I still feel unwanted most of the time
I am now seven pounds to my target weight and love all the nice comments I am getting. I feel good about my looks :-) I did the race for life today and enjoyed it - I want to do more walking as I enjoy it and it will keep me fit.
I've finished the three shows I was doing and was fortunate enough to get into the next one and even have a dance solo ! It's been so many years since I danced solo - it's scary ....
I finished and passed my Psychology degree. I've opted to have my graduation next year and the one this year clashed with a wedding I am going to. I was a bit disappointed with my grade but when I looked the grades that pulled it down were the courses I did the first two years after we split up. That does make me bitter but I did pass and can still be a member of the British Psychological Society.
Work has its ups and downs. More ups at the moment which is good. I still haven't heard from that job so contacted the manager to find out what is happening. It is unlikely that I will get it, but he won't confirm that yet,
The divorce is not complete. I just received the form to sign yesterday and that will now go to court. I'm hoping it will go quickly now without question. My husband keeps asking for money so I want this over so I know what is mine and let me move on.
I had a lovely weekend away with my fiends in Spain. It's like a little respite for me there. However I have loads of holiday to use and want to go away somewhere but can't make my mind up on when or where....
I'm getting used to being on my own and starting to enjoy it. I do like being with friends too but they are all pretty much busy doing their own thing. Weekends are usually the time I find myself alone. But I keep myself busy in the week and where I can at the weekend,
I'm starting to find the real me again and trying to do things I want to do. I went to Ascot for a friends Hen do. Wasn't what I expected but good to have done it.
I decided I don't want another relationship. I don't need it and I don't want to get hurt again.
